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Keeping the fact that I was a psychic from him because I didn't have faith to think he would still love me, I wasn't about to tell him about this experience. I wasn't far wrong. Besides, husbands commit wives to sanitariums every day.
My ex-husband had told me, on numerous occasions, he would put me in a mental institution. The reason he threatened me with this was because I always told him who he had been with and what he had done the night before. Being the helpful teacher he was, he continued to test me with other women on a nightly basis.
Fear had been ingrained in me all my life. My father, without realizing it, had taught me I could use my abilities only in church. Here I was married to a man who could have me institutionalized without conflict from anyone in my family, or so I thought. Not thinking even my father would try to help me; I ran scared of telling anyone.
Since then, I have come to realize that was one of my budding lessons. Part of my being human was to learn this lesson.
Being proud of who I am and making use of my abilities with others is a part of my growth. It didn't matter how hard the lesson was. I had to learn to quit fearing. Fear is Failure.
By that I mean, when you are so frightened that you are unable to do what you know you should. Then you have failed. As long as you keep trying and be true to yourself, then you are a success. Not trying because you are afraid is what causes failure.
I know without a doubt that when we die we go to a place where we can circle the world and more with a thought because I have been there. It is a place of supreme love and understanding. There is no fear. You are in God's love. You are God's Love.
Dying in this manner served to teach me more than one lesson. One is that we are able to die just by willing it and another is I saw the other side in a way, which few others have.
Though it was glorious on the Other Side, one should not think of taking the easy way out. Doing that would only cause more concern for the suicide victim once he or she dies.
Page 69
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